So I did it.

I unliked/unfriended/unfollowed all running or work out pages on Facebook other than the races I've signed up for.  I know, I know, what am I thinking?  Those pages are there to motivate, encourage, remind us to work out and put our best foot forward.  And goodness knows there are days that I need the motivation.  There are days when I need the kick in the pants and the reminder not to have the extra cookie or bar or bowl of ice cream.  Okay, lots of days.  But the fact of the matter is that most days I work out and at least try to eat healthy or responsibly, but one thing never changes.  I am always too competitive.  And quite frankly I'm sick of feeling guilty.  

Let me explain.  Just a few days ago it looked like I was going to have a few hours alone in the evening with just my oldest and myself.  She's 13.  So few years left with her and every day I remind myself that each moment with her is precious.  We all know that before long she will be out with friends, even busier with activities and beyond my reach.  These few hours we have together are getting fewer and farther between.  Someone suggested that I take her out for a mother/daughter dinner and my first reaction wasn't, "great idea".  My first reaction was, "today is Thursday.  My workout schedule says that I need to get 5 miles in and I was planning to do some additional strength training.  I've already logged too many calories to really be able to afford the calories eating out, etc..."  And then I caught myself.  I checked myself and was ashamed.  When did that workout - that calorie counting - become more important than a dinner with my daughter?

I'm not saying being healthy isn't a priority.  I'm not saying I won't be working out and working toward achieving my running goals.  I will say that I gave myself a little reality check and will do my best not to get so wrapped up in the process that I lose track of the end goal.  Being a good example for my girls on health and happiness also means putting family first.