Barn time

There is something about barn time that is just what the doctor ordered after a crazy day.  I had big goals for tonight and I'm happy to say that I achieved all of them!  I was on my own as my entire family was off to watch the school team at the state soccer playoffs.  So it was just me.  Of course I had to keep them updated, complete with picture updates as I went along.
Kuzco was the first to get pampered.  He needed a quick bath - thank goodness for a nice day.  He had a slight case of rain rot that we treated with MTG a week ago.  Why can they not make that stuff smell better?  Dang - burnt bacon grease is the best way I can describe it.  And it is just as greasy.  But it works.  So a quick bath with dawn dish soap to cut the grease and betadine to make sure we killed the nasty.  Then off to dry while I stripped his stall and got it aired out, dried, deodorized and restocked for him.

What do people do to work with their weanlings?  It's not like we can start lunging or saddle training.  Little bugger already stands tied forever.  I swear he would stand tied day and night.  We don't have our trail obstacles moved yet so basically we work on walk/trot in halter and set up.  He's catching on fast, so just basic manners and learning to love us.

Next step was to get Ace out.  He's finally sound again and umm... "fleshy" as my grandma used to refer to those who were pleasantly plump.  So I lunged him a bit.  And then, because Libby was gone and no one could stop me, I hopped on him bareback.  Of course I had to send her a picture.  I think she was okay with the idea?

I worked the barn owners halter horse on the lungeline and moved on to my fourth, final and favorite project, China.  She's such a quiet, good girl and so dang smart.  Even if she doesn't wow the world in the pleasure ring, she is not going to disappoint with her stellar attitude.  I have yet to find something that worries her.  Have to get my trail obstacles here and see what we can throw at her.  I might find something yet.
It may have taken me three hours, but only horse people will understand how all that work ended up being the most relaxing and calming part of my day.

Dress shopping for "the dress"

So I’m starting to wedding dress shop.  The big day is over a year away, but I feel like I really should start narrowing down the massive selection of dresses I like.  It doesn’t fail that I see one I really like and I’m like “that’s the one” and then two clicks away I’m like “no, this is it.  This is the one.”  I have shopped in person as well and really really liked a dress.  But as soon as I left the shop I started having my doubts so I’m guessing that I still haven’t found “the one”.  And Tim, this is where you stop reading unless you want to know too much!

With that said, here’s my criteria.  First of all, everything about this wedding is going to be completely different and all unique to Tim and my special day.  No carryover memories from that “other wedding” that we won’t talk about.  So that means, no long sleeves.  My first dress was ivory, so I’m going white.  Which also goes along with my color scheme of white, silver and blue. Did I mention it’s a winter wedding?  So excited!  Snowflakes and silver and more snowflakes and glitter and eek! I'm so excited!

That narrows down two options, white and not long sleeve.  Did you know there are million options for “not long sleeve”?  I also know I don’t want strapless.  No matter how many times the gal at the bridal shop assured me that they have options for keeping the sisters in place, that is not something I want to worry about on my big day.  So we are down to only like a hundred thousand options.  

And that isn’t even fit yet.  I know I don’t want short or mermaid. Or sheath - which can I just say shouldn’t be the name of a style of dress.  It’s just not right.  So that leaves me with A-line or ball gown, which I love but can’t decide between.  So my choices are around tens of thousands now.  

Here I am, I’m shopping through dresses and trying to narrow down what my style or my look is and failing rather miserably.  They are all so pretty.  Except for some of them, ummm…  like wow?   And some of them look like something I couldn’t pee in.  That’s an important thing to plan ahead for you know.  I drink a lot of water in a day, I pee a lot.  This is a contingency I am planning for ahead of time.  Reality check? Where does all of that go when you have to use the bathroom?

And excuse me, but how tall are these models?  They have like perfectly normal torsos and then 10 foot long legs?  I don’t think so.  Why is it necessary to have them standing on a step ladder.  Can’t we just picture the dresses with realistic women in them?  And maybe not a size zero.  I feel that there is far larger portion of society that is a size 8 than a size 0.  I want an accurate representation of what this dress will look like on someone who actually ate three meals a day recently.  

And I leave you with another gem. I shared this one with a few people and we all came to the decision that it was a bit conservative. So going to have to keep looking.

Needless to say, the task is overwhelming and not as easy as I thought it would be. For someone who loves to shop, but hates to make decisions, I may not be up to this task.

Our China Doll

Friends and family sometimes have a hard time keeping up with who is in our pasture and who we are bringing to the shows.  Believe me, we often have a hard time ourselves.  The plan for 2016 was for Libby to show Ellie as her primary horse, Ace in 3 year old and for me to show Zippy.  Things changed suddenly right before the first show and I was going to be showing Simon, Ellie was hurt and Ace had to step up and be Libby’s main horse for the entire season.  Luckily we did get Zippy back in time for her to qualify for a few more classes at Champ Show because Ace decided he was mortally wounded just because he had a short trim.  Simon also came up lame so Champ Show didn’t happen for us this year, but I’m thankful for what I was able to accomplish on him the shows that we were able to get to.  

What some people didn’t know is that we had a lovely filly waiting in the wings at home who didn’t get to come to many shows (she made one) as she also had a short trim and a crack in her sole that needed to toughen up and grow out.  It’s been a tough year for us lameness wise - don’t ask.  Plus she was just a yearling, so washing, clipping, banding, etc… is a lot of work for one halter class.  

Anyway!  Everyone always asks, who is this and where did you get her?  So I thought I’d share the story of how China came to be with us.  Last winter Libby and I were window shopping for horses.  For you non horse people, that means searching horse sale sites and seeing what’s for sale.  I always claim I’m just doing market analysis to see what horses are selling for, but the truth is, I’m always looking and dreaming.  Both of us were loving our Ellie, Maid Ya a Dream and we talked often about how amazing she was and easy to ride and train.  We both said we would love another like her.  And then Libby stumbled across an ad for a weanling, coming yearling called Maid of Copper who was bred a lot like Ellie and located just a bit away in Iowa.  

I contacted the seller and asked all the right questions, I hoped, and he sent a short video to show her running around in the paddock.  He offered to meet me halfway and I sent a deposit to bring her home.  

Then life kind of fell apart for us and our home was in upheaval just a few weeks before we were supposed to meet to pick her up.  With uncertainty about our future, losing the truck we used to haul with, and not knowing what my financial status would be, I sent a message to the seller telling him we were going to have to back out of the deal and I understood I would probably lose my deposit.  

When I tried to explain to Libby she would have none of it.  We were getting that filly and we would figure it out and make things work together.  Sometimes it is hard to remind myself that she is only 16 (15) at the time.  We borrowed my dad’s truck and made arrangements to meet her.  Strangest thing is that when I messaged the seller to tell him we were back on and would be headed his way, he had never gotten the message saying we weren’t going to be able to get her.  Taking that as a sign we hooked up and headed her way.  We even brought Tim along as one of our first dates.  Honestly, I knew he was a keeper when he volunteered to spend hours driving to get this filly with us, even after I warned him we were guaranteed to talk about horses all the way there and all the way back.  

The roads were terrible to start and the trip seemed to take forever.  We met Ken and his filly in a parking lot of a restaurant and he unloaded this big hunk of a yearling.  The first thing that struck us all was her size.  She was huge for a yearling (and not even having reached her first birthday yet).  People always think their horses are bigger than they are.  When Ken told me she was 14 hands as a yearling I was like, “okay, right.”  But China stepped off and she was easily 14 hands.  We had taken good old Zippy along as a trailer buddy and he was excited to have her with us but she was not interested in getting in our trailer.  Honestly, looking back, this poor thing had never been trailered and here we were expecting her to load for only the second time in a busy parking lot.  It took a little pushing but she did load quietly and we made the journey home.  

We have come to know and love our China Doll.  She has such a loving, fun personality.  A lot of try and a heart of gold.  She is wicked smart, which can be kind of scary.  Show her something once and she remembers.  Which is great if you’re doing the right things, but this is one you can’t make mistakes with.  She flew through desensitization as she isn’t the type to get worked up or nervous about much.  She learned lunging in a day.  She yields hind quarter and front quarter quickly and easily.  We have progressed to ground driving which is the first thing she’s faced that she isn’t super excited about.  But mostly because she is still learning patience.  Keep her feet moving and she’s happy.  Standing still when her buddies are back in the pasture?  Not so much.  

We still love people’s reactions when they meet China.  Everyone’s first reaction is “THAT’S a yearling!  She’s huge!” It’s fun to have a training project in the barn and a blast to watch the lightbulbs come on for her.  Here’s fingers crossed to a bright future for China.

Lost my iPhone

I love the teachers I work with for all the usual reasons.  They make me laugh and smile, they are great support when things aren’t going well, they are there to vent to or run ideas by and they always have my back.  Now normally that is relegated to things pertaining to education.  But the other day the guys (did I mention my team is 4 guys and me) really stepped it up.

We had been conferencing in the hall after school.  Which meant we were probably discussing some sports team or funny video/TV show.  I had already changed to go to the barn and realized that the time had come when I should probably get going.  We wrapped up our conversation and headed our separate ways.  When I went to grab my phone I suddenly realized that, not only did I not know where it was, I couldn’t really remember when I had it last.  Frantically I searched through my bag, then went and checked the bathroom where I changed.  No phone.

Coming back to my room I ran into Riley who started to help me look.  He called my phone, and while it was on silent so it didn’t exactly help me find my phone, because my apple watch rang it told me that my phone was still in the building as the two were still connected. Pretty soon I had enlisted Tom and then Joe to help as well.  The four of us searched my bag again, checked the bathroom again, then checked my bag again, you know how it goes.  

Finally Riley saved the day when he asked if I had the Find My Iphone app.  Why hadn’t I thought of that right away!  So we all huddled around and waited for Riley’s phone to ping mine.  We got the message that it was sending a tone but didn’t hear a thing.  So like a pack of hounds in search of a scent, we headed out into the hall.  Picture the four of us, tilting our heads and wandering in the hall when all of a sudden someone heard the sound coming from back in my room.  We were like bloodhounds on the trail when we followed the sound where it led us back to my group work table.  There sat my phone in plain sight.  Why is it always in plain sight when you finally find something?

Thankfully they didn’t give me too much crap after wasting 20 minutes of their afternoons and I’m very relieved to still have my phone!  

I Give Up.

I’ll never be more glad to see an election over with than I will be when the polls close on November 8, 2016.  It has been one of the most disheartening and heartsick elections that I have ever witnessed.  And not because my favorite candidate may or may not win.  Because of all the hatred and divisiveness that has come out the election and the outright lies that keep being spread on social media.  

I’m beyond trying to talk sense into Trump supporters.  They refuse to listen to reason and only want to believe the hatred that he spews and the lies that he tells.  And one of his favorite lies is that Hilary lies.  Oh the hypocrisy.  These same people do not research or fact check, but spread what Trump’s page puts out as the truth.  Even when I am able to provide factual evidence that proves it isn’t true, the response is “Yeah, but Hilary lies” or “Bengahzi”.  I’ve come to realize it is like talking to a brick wall.  To save friendships I’ve had to unfollow people until after the election.  Their opinion is their opinion, no matter how flawed or blind I feel it may be.  

But there is a recent issue that sticks in my throat and I have to speak out on.  And some of you Trump supporters should be ashamed.  Ashamed!  This is in reference to the recent recording that was leaked of Trump talking about women and saying he would cheat on his wife with a married woman.  

His defenders claim it’s just “locker room talk”.  This is sick.  If my husband, boyfriend, fiance, son, or close friend talked about his wife and other women in this way, they would be certain I wouldn’t be writing it off as “locker room talk”.  Cheating is cheating and is not a joke.  It is not okay.  And it isn’t something that should be condoned or thought of as funny.  And before you Trump supporters go, “But Bill Clinton cheated and he was actually president!”  EXACTLY.  And it was wrong and sick and HE IS NOT RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT.  When are people going to get that?  Bill was wrong and Hillary was wronged.  I couldn’t agree more.  Moral corruption is not something to excuse as locker room talk.  It is something to be horrified by and to find reprehensible.  

As far as this meme goes:

Have you read 50 Shades of Gray?  I have.  And nowhere in there is cheating condoned.  And I certainly don’t hold the fictional (yes - do you all understand this is fiction) main character as a paradigm of civic virtue.  And I absolutely would not elect the fictional character (I can’t believe I’m having to clarify this) as president of the United States.  Wow, how is that even remotely tied to the potential president of the United States saying he is going to grab a woman by the pussy and he is going to kiss her because he can get away with since he’s rich?  I’m not offended by his language.  I’m offended by his disrespect for women and his obvious lack of morals.  That’s upsetting to me and should be upsetting to the American public.

Still don’t get it?  Let’s try this.  Imagine that your daughter is married to this guy.  And this guy’s idea of “locker room talk” is to talk about how if he gets the chance he’s going to screw this hot chick he sees.  Thus tearing your daughter’s heart out and ripping apart their family.  But it’s okay, because he’s rich.  And it’s just “locker room talk”.  Keep in mind he also loves to kiss every woman he can because they let him since he’s rich.  Still like him and think it’s funny?  How about imagining that he sees your attractive daughter and smacks his buddy on the back and talks about how he’s going to grab her by the pussy.  Funny huh?  

This is the man you want leading our country?  Oh but it’s okay because he’s angry and against virtually every minority group in the U.S. so that will “fix our country”.  And he’s a political outsider so that is even better because that worked out so well for Minnesota during the Ventura years.  Sigh.  I give up.  

Cici's closed? What?

http://www.kttc.com/story/33335335/2016/10/Thursday/last-cicis-pizza-in-minnesota-closes-abruptly-in-rochester

Guilty pleasures.  Everyone has them.  Those things you love that you don’t like to talk about?  I’m always embarrassed to say that a favorite place to eat was Cici’s.  I am not a picky eater.  And I love comfort food.  Nothing is more comforting than mac n cheese or pizza.  And Cici’s puts them together.  Cici’s and only Cici’s.  No where else have I ever tasted, tried and loved Mac N Cheese pizza.  And they also had those doughy little brownies.  And cinnamon rolls.  And bacon stuffed crust.  And…

The last couple of weeks Tim and I have gone on a few date nights.  At our age date night is a euphemism for Walmart run and grocery getting with a meal on the side.  Twice I suggested we go to Cici’s and both times Tim thought we should try something else more “date like” and save Cici’s for when we had the kids.  It is a cost effective way to get everyone full.  So we “saved” Cici for a later date.  

Last night I’m scrolling through Facebook and guess what I see.  A news article saying the last Minnesota Cici’s had closed.  That’s right UNEXPECTEDLY shut its doors.  No warning, no going out of business, just closed.  I’m crushed.  I never even got to have that final slice of mac n cheese pizza to say goodbye.   And Tim feels bad of course, but this is good lesson.  Never put off until tomorrow what you want to eat today.  Because that tomorrow may never come.  Someone should make a meme of that.  It’s good advice.

Online dating

Online dating - the wave of the future.  You’ve heard the horror stories but I hope you’ve heard the positive ones as well.  My life has been changed forever and for the better because of online dating.  I have to share my experience for anyone who has thought of trying or has tried it in the past.  Share your stories too!

When I asked Ryan to leave and found out what he had done, I was pretty much done with men.  Ready to be alone, maybe invest in the crazy cat lady starter kit or something.  Both my therapist and my very good friends told me not to give up, that there were honest men out there who did know how to treat women right.  I laughed but thought, what the heck.  Not a quitter I guess?  But where do you meet men when you are almost 40?  And I wasn’t looking to meet men who hung out at bars, I don’t exactly work at a singles club and well… umm… college classes weren’t really on the table?  So now what?  One of my good friends who was happily in a relationship with someone she met online shared a dating site with me.  And the best part it was FREE!  Do you know that some of those dating sites cost $30 PER MONTH?  Finding your dream date isn’t exactly cheap these days.  I didn’t want to have to choose between finding the man of my dreams and putting gas in the car so I signed up for Plenty of Fish.

First you have to set up your profile.  Let me just tell you that answering some of those questions wasn’t easy.  Especially the “describe yourself” part.  I wanted to meet people, lots of people, have some fun conversations, laugh, etc...  But the temptation to write “if you don’t know the difference between you’re and your, keep on clicking past me” was strong.  I fought the urge though and I think I blathered on about my kids being important and loving horses and doing stuff outside.  

Apparently I used the right picture and said the right stuff because I did get lots of messages at first.  Fresh meat and all that.  And let me tell you that there are some really nice guys out there.  Some I didn’t have a lot in common with, but I had a lot of very nice conversations and enjoyed chatting with many of them.  In fact, two of them are still friends to this day, long after I have deleted my profile.  

But the funny stuff were the other conversations.  First of all, if there wasn’t a picture I deleted any conversation requests.  Just too creepy.  Sorry all you random people out there - maybe you’re very nice and I didn’t give you a chance because I thought you were a serial killer.  I’m a small town girl and it’s the new millennium.  Everyone has at least one digital image they can upload.

I also checked out pictures before answering and deleted many a conversation.  And no - I’m not self centered and picky.  I wasn’t looking at the guy’s looks.  But if your main picture was your Harley or your truck, I swiped left.  DELETE!  If your pictures show you drinking with your buddies.  DELETE.  If your picture showed you half naked and flexing… I mean, c’mon...really?  DELETE.  And I’m not going to lie - I enlisted help from my friends.  I’m a girl, I need to run you by my besties before I make any decisions.  

Despite the rampant deleting, I talked with several decent guys and a few of them mentioned actually meeting.  But every time I chickened out.  I had loads of excuses.  I was busy, I was nervous, I wanted to get to know them more first, etc… And these were perfectly nice guys.  I had already deleted the guys that went from completely normal conversations to “you run and ride horse, I bet you have a nice ass.”  I bet those guys are still wondering where they went wrong.  But even the nice, normal conversations weren’t enough for me to gather the courage to actually MEET someone.  But then there was this one guy…

Maybe it was because he said he just wanted to see me and say hi at a basketball game?  It doesn’t get much safer than that.  Surrounded by my Falcon family, in a very public place, okay - I can meet you and say hi.  Maybe because he was a teacher at a neighboring district and I had my good friends check him out first?  Maybe because I stalked him online and Facebook and didn’t find anything?  Maybe because I had a friend do a quick background check on him?  Maybe because another friend checked him out on court websites? Did I mention I’m paranoid and have made bad choices about the opposite sex in the past?  Talk about your friends not letting anything go wrong this time!

The good news was that he wasn’t an axe murderer!  Or at least he didn’t seem like it and/or kept a very tiny axe in his back pocket.  And I survived the 5 minute meeting.  So I agreed to the first date.  And then a second.  And the rest, as they say is history.

Today we are engaged, live in relative peace (we do have four kids from two families - let’s be real here) and are excited to make it official in 2018.  But still, when people ask how we met it gives me a squirmy embarrassed feeling to say “we met online”.  Despite the stigma, I can say I had a very positive experience with online dating and would recommend it to any friends and family looking to meet new people.  And my suggestion, go free first!  

PS - When you delete your online profile be prepared for a lengthly process. And for an added chuckle, the last step is to click that you either want to keep your page or "I Give Up". Nothing like an online dating site making you feel like a quitter!

I'm back!

Hey everybody!  I'm back!  Sorry for the several month long hiatus.  I had gotten bad at blogging, but that has to be the longest I have ever gone without boring you all with my posts.  Can't let that happen again.

What has me back you ask?  This past weekend I finally got to meet someone that I have been internet acquaintances with for years and she said she loved my blog!  Who knew!  I had a fan!  So you can all blame her for my blathering on from here on out.

I changed the blog a little.  Well, just the title.  We are no longer just three ladies.  We've added to our family!  And we have relocated so had to drop the Harmony.  I thought about keeping the "in harmony" to describe our family lifestyle.  But "in chaos" or "in disarray" might have been more accurate.  (I kid.  Well.  Kind of.)

So!  I'm back and maybe, I'll remember to stay back.