A Better Place

So today is two weeks from wedding rehearsal night and just a little over two weeks until the big day.  I know I should be getting nervous or worried or panicked, but instead I'm just getting more excited and looking forward to the big day.  I'm so thrilled with everything and so blessed to have so many people in my life helping make sure that Tim and my day goes as well as it possibly can.  I don't know where I would be without my best friend, my sister, Tim's sister, Paula, Julie, and so many others.  You guys are all amazing.  I'm probably more nervous about the rehearsal dinner and Sunday brunch being at my house and hosting that, then I am the actual ceremony.

But I am getting off topic.  One of the things I am super excited about is the songs that will be sung at the wedding.  And the most special of those is the song "A Better Place" by Rachel Platten.  I first heard the song on one of Tim and I's first dates.  I was on the way home from seeing him in St Charles when it came on the radio.

A Better Place:

Lyrics

I'll tell the world, I'll sing a song
It's a better place since you came along
Since you came along
Your touch is sunlight through the trees
Your kisses are the ocean breeze
Everything's alright when you're with me

And I hold my favorite thing
I hold the love that you bring
But it feels like I've opened my eyes again
And the colors are golden and bright again
There's a song in my heart, I feel like I belong
It's a better place since you came along
It's a better place since you came along

I see the whole world in your eyes
It's like I've known you all my life
We just feel so right
So I pour my heart into your hands
It's like you really understand
You love the way I am

And I hold my favorite thing
I hold the happiness you bring
But it feels like I've opened my eyes again
And the colors are golden and bright again
And the sun paints the skies and the wind sings our song
It's a better place since you came along
It's a better place since you came along

Now I'm alright
Now I'm alright
Everything's alright

'Cause it feels like I've opened my eyes again
And the colors are golden and bright again
There's a song in my heart, I feel like I belong
It's a better place since you came along
It's a better place since you came along

Songwriters: Rachel Platten / Sally Seltmann

The lyrics couldn't describe how I feel about Tim better if I had explained my life and how Tim made me feel to Rachel and had her write a song just for us.  Many of you know that I had gone through a couple pretty crappy relationships before I met Tim.  I didn't hold much hope for finding that special someone, finding that elusive unicorn, the fairy tale.  I had even talked to my therapist at the time about taking a break from men, possibly permanently.  Like I joked at the time, I was one step away from ordering the crazy cat lady starter kit.  But Frank convinced me that I had more to give and that there was surely at least one guy my age that met my long list of criteria like, "doesn't cheat" and "isn't a drunk" and "tells me I'm pretty".  Impossibly high standards, right?

So I put myself out there and vowed not to get serious with anyone. No relationships.  Just go on dates, meet people and have a good time.  I wanted to meet lots of people and I did not want to commit to any of them.  Commitment was scary and meant I could be hurt again.  I wanted to avoid that at all costs.  Enter Tim.  Tim screwed up that plan in a big way.

Not that I didn't fight him at the beginning.  He would love to tell you the story of how I "rejected" him.  The truth is he sent me flowers and I panicked that it was getting too serious too fast.  I worried about hurting him.  Hurting me.  And doing it "wrong".  I was worried about what others would think.  I was worried about how fast he made me feel comfortable and how much I liked him.  I was worried about the fact that I didn't want to see other people, that I was crazy about him.   So yeah, I told him the flowers were too soon and that I had to see other people.  But guess what.  I didn't.

So fast forward and I'm driving home when this song comes on and it is so perfect.  Of course I had to send it to Tim.  And of course he agreed with me.  Just like that, we had "our song".  And now every time it comes on my heart does a little flip flop and I get butterflies.

I had always thought of myself as broken after the end of my last relationship.  But I wasn't broken.  I was just a little bruised on the inside and it turns out Tim was just the man for the job of making me see that.  I am so lucky to have him in my life and I am so blessed that he has made all of our lives "a better place".

Click here to hear our song:  A Better Place