One of her experiences was a visit to the National Cathedral. She messaged me to tell me that while there she had lit a candle for her Great-Grandma Pokey whom she lost this summer. After lighting the candle she got a feeling of comfort and peace which she said felt like Grandma saying, "I'll be fine. I'll be watching over you" which moved her to tears. I get tears days later just reading that again. As a family, the girls and I were and remain firm believers in our strong grandparents and my mom watching over us. Since the girls were little they have been told countless times that their Grandma Angel (my mom) was watching over them. Sadly, since then, we have added two other matriarchs to their list of grandma angels watching over them. All of these women were so very different, but all were remarkable in their own ways.
When my mom was in hospice, one of the things she feared was that people would forget about her. I assured her then and I have worked since, to make sure that my girls know their Grandma Angel. They know how much she loved, how hard she worked, how crazy she drove me (keeping it real here) and how incredibly strong she was. My mother was a tiny woman. Some of my Facebook friends may recall how Sophie was the only family member to fit into her wedding dress when we got it out this past summer. Sophie, whom everybody comments is tiny for her age, barely fit into my mom's dress. That may give you an idea of her size. But don't let that fool you, what she lacked in size, she made up for in heart. There wasn't anything that little lady feared. I don't remember her every backing down and she had her convictions. She was fiercely protective of those she loved and she loved with every bit of her being. She loved my dad so much that she left everything and everyone she knew and moved to our tiny corner of SE MN where he was from. As an adult with kids, I can fully appreciate how brave she was. Growing up in a suburb of Chicago, to living on a farm in the middle of Nowheresville, MN was a huge step. That is just one small example of how strong and how hard my mom loved. Growing up, that strength would butt heads with my teenage selfishness but there has never been a time in my life where I didn't respect my mom. Don't worry mom, I tell the girls stories about you all the time. You are not forgotten.
Another force for only a brief time in my girls' lives was their Great- Grandma Kiehne. This was my dad's mom and she was the true leader of her family. While my mom was tiny, my Grandma Ethel was a tall woman with not only tremendous spiritual and mental strength, but great physical strength as well. For years she had grown up on a farm and spent her married life farming as well. She wasn't your typical housewife. She could be seen in all aspects of the farm, working alongside the men, as well as returning to the kitchen to cook for as many farmhands or visitors would be around for that meal. No one went hungry when my grandma was cooking. Grandma was also known for taking in those that needed a little extra help. It wasn't until I was an adult that I learned how many people my grandparents had taken in over the years due to hard times or needing a little extra help. Grandma didn't back down from a tough job, she never shirked her duty one day in her life and she never ever even considered quitting.
Which brings me to the last Grandma Angel that my girls gained this summer. As I said, this past summer they had to lay to rest their Great - Grandma Pokey (Pankow) who was their dad's mom's mom. (Say that 10 times fast) I blogged about her last summer, so many of you probably feel like this is redundant, but I can't say enough about Grandma Pokey. She taught my girls about the joy of squeaky cheesecurds, amazing homemade treats like her pistachio bread and Libby's favorite homemade mints, how a card in the mail can brighten anyone's day and most importantly, she taught the girls about love and forgiving. Once you were loved by Grandma Pokey, you were always loved. Grandma never held it against me that I divorced her grandson and we were all still welcomed into her home. Even at 40 I smiled when those cards came for me on my birthday and special holidays. It has been really hard to know that there won't be a special handwritten note from Grandma Pokey in my mailbox ever again. Grandma loved and she loved fiercely. I know they have struggled with her passing and there are a lot of days where we talk and remember Grandma. I hope she is in heaven right now surrounded by her many many cats and with all the pea salad, caramel rice krispie bars and so many other treats that she spoiled us with every holiday.
My girls are lucky to have so many grandma angels watching over them and beaming with pride. I know that they are always with them, always lifting them up, always guiding them. (And probably sometimes shaking their heads at them.) Just remember ladies, there was a time when you said "I hope you have kids that give you just as much trouble as you have given me." They haven't disappointed you yet! Here's to strong women!
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